My Girls

Things To Do on a Cold Winter Day - #1

The kids and I have discovered TumbleBooks, which are animated storybooks that can be accessed through the Iowa City Public Library's website. The stories are organized alphabetically by title and, if you have older kids, also have accompanying questions to assess reading comprehension.



This free on-line resource is a nice alternative to videos (at least it keeps me from feeling guilty...) on those afternoons when it's too cold to head outside. Some of our favorites include: Calliou Tidies His Toys, Calliou & Gilbert, Little Pea, and The Fire Station.



The kids and I were cuddled up on the couch Friday afternoon "reading" our favorite TumbleBooks when Chris came home from work (see below).



Look how happy it made us? (Okay, I look a little demented here but, really, I was happy).

When Asked to Entertain His Sister...

Ben does not disappoint.

A Comment on Guilt

Despite the fact that Maggie is quite loved by her older brother and sister I have spent a great deal of time over the past two weeks feeling guilty.

Guilty that things have changed (even if the cause is the wonderful Miss Maggie). Guilty because I feel like no one is getting the quantity and quality of time and attention that they did two weeks ago. Guilty because we have had some wrinkles (a few accidents, a few temper tantrums, some naughtiness) even though none of it has been directed at the baby. Guilty that Ben is now the only boy and the Middle Child.

Then I started to reflect on my own family. I am the oldest of three children and am 3 and 4 years older than my younger brothers. I remember nothing about their arrival. Not one thing. Of course we have pictures documenting their birthdays and I am holding them and grinning but I don't remember feeling shortchanged by their presence.

And I think about my relationship with my brothers now. About how lucky I am to have them. About how much richer my life is because of my brothers, not in spite of them.

Without my brothers, who would give me honest insights into the psyche of the Middle Child? When I told Devin that I felt guilty Ben would be the middle child he responded, "Being the middle child is the best of both worlds." And then in typical little-brother-who-loves-to-torment fashion he continued, "I'm like a hybrid...better than both you and Mike." Then he started laughing.

Without my brothers, who would show up at my door at 4:00 on a Wednesday afternoon willing to play with my kids for an hour so that I can have a break? My brother, Mike, moved back to Iowa City around Thanksgiving and since his arrival he has spent a fair amount of his free time as an actor in the imaginative games of my children. He's been the Big Bad Wolf, "It" in freeze tag and an integral player of games, such as basketball, Uno, Candyland, and Hut-Hut-Hike (Ben's version of football).

When viewed through this lens, my guilt is assuaged (at least for today). I can consider the ways that Maggie's arrival will enrich Cate and Ben's lives--not just as children, but as adults as well.

Maggie - Week 2

A few pictures of Maggie from last week:


First bath, with lots of help from Cate and Ben





















Cuddling with Grandpa Doug

What Big Boys Do

Ever since Maggie was born we've tried to praise "big boy" behavior whenever we see it. As in, "Big boys stay in their beds at bedtime." As in, "Big boys don't throw their sippy cups on the floor."

Ben is not entirely convinced by our logic, as evidenced by the conversation that he and Chris had this morning.


Chris: Buddy, don't pick your nose. Big boys use Kleenex's when they have something in their nose.

Ben: Nope. Big boys use fingers.

Advice.

Dear Readers-

If you've ever nursed a baby I need some advice...I had a lactation consultant tell me that I should wake Maggie up every 3 hours to eat.

However, she usually sleeps for 4 (sometimes even 5) hours at a stretch and I have a very, very, VERY hard time with the idea of waking a sleeping baby.

She's back to her birth weight, poops like crazy, and when she DOES eat seems happy and satisfied. She has "awake" time in between these crazy naps where she is alert and content.

Also, for me, it's not a question of milk supply. I could feed starving children in Africa with the amount of milk I'm producing.

I have never had an almost 2-week old who actually SLEEPS for 4-5 hours at a time so this is a new dilemma for me. I swear Cate woke up to eat every two hours for her first month of life.

Your thoughts are greatly appreciated!

(Now if I could only get some of this great napping karma to rub off on Ben...)

Maggie - Week 1

Maggie in the hospital with a picture that Cate made at school.

Meeting Grandma Sheila at the hospital

On her way home from the hospital

Hanging out with Ben and Daddy. Ben's first words, upon meeting Maggie for the first time at the hospital, were "I love you Baby" as he kissed her forehead.

Meeting Grandma and Grandpa Chamberlain

Maggie's first visit to the Tot Lot on Friday morning with Cate

What a Difference Two Weeks (and Two Pounds!) Makes

Maggie's newborn check-up was last Friday morning and...everything was perfect. She is only 2 ounces from her birthweight and only a tiny bit jaundiced.

I can't describe the feeling of relief that I had as I pulled out of the parking lot after the appointment.

Cate was born almost 4 weeks early and at her newborn check-up she was immediately admitted to the NICU with a severe case of jaundice. (Oh, and did I mention that I was scheduled to defend my dissertation in 10 days??)

Ben was born precisely 2 weeks early and at his newborn check-up we learned that he had lost such a significant amount of weight that we needed to wake him up every two hours to eat and come in for repeated weight checks over the next week and a half. We literally had to strip him down to his diaper and hold cold washcloths to his feet in order to wake him up.

Needless to say the first few weeks of both Cate and Ben's lives were decidedly stressful. In contrast, Maggie seems quite easy by comparison. After all, she's not in intensive care and she's able to wake up to eat on her own. Two pretty major advantages over her siblings, if you ask me.

Introducing...

Margaret Elyse born January 11 at 10:29 p.m.

Maggie weighed 8 pounds, 9 ounces and was 20.5 inches long.

She is perfectly perfect in every way and Cate and Ben were thrilled to meet her this morning.

We Love Herky

Despite their lousy record, we've made it to quite a few Hawkeye basketball games this year. For Cate and Ben the highlight is usually ice cream. They love the ice cream at Carver-Hawkeye Arena and they usually begin pleading for a cone the second we walk through the door.

The Hawks' loss to Michigan State did nothing to lessen Cate and Ben's enjoyment of the game.

Not only did they get to eat ice cream (a chocolate and vanilla twist cone), Ben went potty in the restroom (a fact that he loudly shouted to everyone sitting in our section when we returned), AND the kids finally got to "meet" Herky and get their picture taken with him.

Being a Baby

After lunch today Ben climbed into my lap and pretended to be a baby.

Ben: Wah! Wah! I a baby.

Me (trying to head this off NOW instead of after Baby K's arrival): I don't know why you want to be a baby. Babies can't play with their friends at Tot Lot or ride bikes. Babies can't even eat French fries or ice cream.

Cate: And they cry a lot.

Ben (snuggles against my shoulder): Wah! Wah! I a baby!

Me: Hmmm. How old are you Baby?

Ben: I two.

Me: Two! You can't be a baby! You're a big boy.

Ben: No. I just very tall.

Waiting...

As you know if you're a regular reader of this blog...Baby K has yet to make an appearance.

Other than being exhausted (I have no trouble falling asleep but I just can't STAY asleep) I actually feel pretty good.

That said, I am extremely irritable.

I have had one of those days that leaves me wondering, "Wow. I can barely handle two kids. How in the hell can I handle three??? And this stay-at-home business is definitely overrated. I think it's time to dust off the resume..."

Let's just say that the day started to go downhill when I had to take them with me to a doctor's appointment this morning. When we got home from the appointment from hell, they fought over a broken cardboard box. Then they fought over a plastic pacifier for their babies. Then Cate informed me, "NO. I'M THE MOM AND I MAKE THE RULES."

Then Ben blew his nose on their new books. Then Cate freaked out because Ben blew his nose on their new books. This was followed by some ninja moves where they hit each other with their new books. (Cate did have a slight advantage here since her book was hard-cover, with sharper corners).

Then I looked at the clock.

It was 9:15 in the morning.

(Just kidding. It was really later than that but you get my point).

And so. The only thing that saved them from being shipped off to boarding school (or at least to my parent's house for the next 15 years) is that at the precise moment I reached my breaking point, they began playing an elaborate game where they pretended to be kittens.

They got out pillows and blankets and crawled under the kitchen table. By themselves. Out of sight. Quietly. For about 25 minutes.

It was not the two-hour spa treatment that I'd been fantasizing about all afternoon but it was enough for me to completely break my New Year's resolution about Internet use (see previous post) and reconnect with the outside world.

Ahhh.

New Year's Resolutions

While waiting for Baby K to arrive, I've been giving some thought to New Year's Resolutions.

I learned a lot in graduate school, much of which is totally useless in my current life.

Believe it or not, no one has ever stopped me on the street and asked me to conduct a factor analysis by hand or wondered if I might be able to discuss the relationship between intelligence and job performance.

I did, however, spend a semester in a decidedly unmotivating doctoral seminar titled, "Motivation and Attitudes." The class was held on a Friday afternoon from 2:30 to 5:00. The required reading was so dry that even the professor teaching the class didn't complete it. This, as you can imagine, did little to motivate the students and left all of us with bad attitudes.

We did spend time discussing goal-setting, specifically how goal-setting theories can be used in the workplace to improve employee performance. (Simply recalling these discussions makes me tired...)

A few of the things I took away from this discussion have stuck with me and are really quite useful when thinking about goal-setting in general.

In short, goals should be SMART. Specific. Measurable. Attainable. Relevant. And Time-Bound. (References available upon request).

And so, with these guidelines in mind, my resolutions for the new year are:

1. Get all cards/gifts to their intended recipients either on or before their special days.

I'm terrible about this! I have good intentions--I even buy cards in advance--but damned if I can get them in the mail on time.

2. Get online only 3 times/day. Morning. Lunch. After the kids go to bed.

I check the internet (e-mail, blog, facebook, NY Times, etc) constantly. Don't ask me who I think is going to contact me. I suppose if Baby K ever arrives this problem might resolve itself since the amount of free time that I have will immediately plummet.

Obviously I have too much time on my hands right now if I'm composing long blog posts recalling my days in graduate school...

On Being 39 Weeks Pregnant

Things That You Should NEVER Say to a Pregnant Woman
1. Wow. You are really BIG.

2. I just can't believe you could get any bigger than you are right now.

3. I have a friend who is due almost the same time as you and she barely looks pregnant!

4. You STILL haven't had that baby?

5. I'm just positive that you're going to have a 9 pound baby. Just positive.

Things that you SHOULD say to a pregnant woman (even if it's not true...)
Wow. You look great!

(NOTE: In the interest of full disclosure, this picture was taken 4 weeks ago. And, yes, I am even bigger now).