Choices

Any parenting book will tell you that the best way to deal with the constant "negativity" of a toddler (NO!) is to give her choices. For example, if you say "Let's get dressed now" your two-year-old might respond with an emphatic, "NO!"

These books recommend that you pose questions such as: Do you want to wear your pink sneakers or your cherry rain boots today? Do you want to go to the park or the library? Do you want to wear your striped shirt or your polka-dotted shirt?

For the most part, this approach has been pretty effective with Cate. Lately I've noticed that she is starting to give me options to avoid hearing the word no.

She'll ask, "Mommy, can I have a cookie? Sure or yes?"

Or, "Mommy, can I go outside and play? Sure or yes?"

Ninja Heist

This morning I logged onto the Iowa City Press Citizen website to skim the headlines of the latest breaking news.

The top headline totally cracked me up:

Police Link Thwarted Robber to Ninja Heist

Say what? I know that crime--especially crime involving ninjas---is a serious matter but you have to admit that headline is pretty funny.

* UPDATE (12/19/08): Iowa City Police have caught their ninja robber...

Classic.

Tonight our beloved babysitter, Jessie, stopped by for a few minutes to exchange Christmas gifts and to introduce us to her new boyfriend.

We have been teasing her for months. How did you meet him? When do WE get to meet him? What if we don't like him? In preparation for the visit Chris and I snickered like teenagers and told Cate that she should ask Jessie if she was "in love."

Imagine our surprise when two hours later (the previous conversation completely forgotten) we were sitting by the fireplace with Jessie and her boyfriend when Cate looked at me and said, "Mom, you ask her."

Confused I replied, "Ask her what, honey?"

Quite clearly Cate responded, "Ask her if she's in LOVE."

Sorry Jessie!

Expert Climber Willing to Help Babyproof Your Home

Do you have a baby that is on the verge of taking his first steps? Does the thought of babyproofing your home leave you overwhelmed? I can help.

My name is Ben and I have single-handedly kept my parents on their toes since I started walking at 10.5 months. Just when they think they have safely placed anything hazardous out of my reach I start climbing on tables and they begin the process again (hee-hee).

Follow me around your house for 30 minutes and I guarantee that I can help you identify everything that a baby is not supposed to have. I am virtual magnet for scissors, loose change, or other choking hazards. If they’re there, I’ll find them.

Trust me, I’m very thorough and will leave no drawer, heat register, or corner unturned. I’ve attached some pictures of my work so that you can see me in action.

Call my parents to set up an appointment. My rates are reasonable.

Overheard

Cate: BEN! DO NOT stand on the chair! You might get hurt and then your mom would be very sad.

Things to do if you are snowed in.

1. Take a picture of yourself.

2. Take a picture of your brother.

3. Take off your clothes and diaper. Run around the house naked while your mom frantically repeats, "You've GOT to put a diaper on!" Laugh hysterically. Then take another picture of yourself.

Sweet Pea and Little Buddy Having Fun

Good news/Bad news

The good news is that we seem to have finally all recovered from the world's most miserable flu virus.

The bad news is that Cate's beloved Bitty Baby has succumbed to the virus that has haunted us for the past week.

Cate described Bitty Baby's illness in painstaking detail, reminding me yet again that kids really do listen to everything.

Cate: MOM. Bitty Baby has diarrhea AGAIN.

Me: Oh no.

Cate: Yeah, it went on her back and on her clothes. Can you give her a bath in the sink?

Me: Sure.

Cate: OK. First I need to change her diaper. Can you make her happy while I change her diaper? She is a wiggle-worm.

MOM! I'm gonna' be all in stripes today! Look!

For reasons that will soon become clear, there are no pictures to accompany this post.

The next time your pediatrician says, "Yes, it is possible for a nasty flu virus to wreak havoc on your small child's intestinal tract for 7-10 days, leaving mountains of dirty laundry, diaper rash, and huge amounts of irritability in it's wake" believe him/her.

It is possible. Ben is living proof.

ARG!

Home.

Both of my brothers are in the Army. Mike went in as an officer and left for Basic Training in Ft. Benning, GA in March 2006. Devin enlisted as headed for Basic Training in Ft. Leonardwood, MO in September, 2007, a few weeks after Mike's unit left for Iraq.

After 14+ months on COB Speicher my parents received a phone call today informing them that my Mikey is on his way home. He is supposed to arrive in Ft. Riley, KS at 2:30 tomorrow afternoon.

Although he missed Thanksgiving (which he probably wouldn't have wanted to spend with us anyway--see previous post) he'll be home for Christmas.

Christmas will be especially special for us this year as Devin will also be home for the holidays. (He's currently studying Arabic at the Defense Language Institute in Monterey, CA).

If you count Cate and Ben, this will be the first holiday that my entire immediate family has ever spent together.

Our Thanksgiving: A Short Summary

Wednesday: Ben has the flu.

Thursday: Ben has the flu. Cate has the flu. Erin has the flu.

Friday: Ben has the flu. Chris has the flu.

Saturday: Ben has the flu.

Sunday: Praying that everyone in our house wakes up happy and healthy.

WARNING! This post may not be suitable for all readers.

"MOM. This is a naked crayon."

A new equation...

Ben + Cheerios + Mom-out-of-the-room = BIG mess

Luckily Sadie is always willing to help with clean up...

Not to brag but...

The critics agree that my culinary skills are quite excellent, particularly when it comes to complex, flavorful dishes like French toast.

Tonight I prepared a delicious meal of French toast, yogurt and mandarin oranges (straight out of the can).

Cate took one bite and declared, "Mommy, you're the best French toast maker I ever met."

Question of the Day

Cate: Mom, does Elmo poop?

Cate's Chosen Profession

We are painting at the kitchen table while Ben takes a nap. Cate holds up her picture so that I can get a closer look.

ME: Cate, that's a really nice picture. Maybe you should be an artist when you grow up.

CATE: No.

ME: OK. What do you want to be when you grow up?

CATE: A noisemaker.

Happy Wednesday!

Good Manners

Although I rarely resort to the old parenting classic, "Because I said so, that's why!" when dealing with my 2-year-old, I do find myself frequently referring to manners when trying to extinguish a particularly annoying, gross, or naughty behavior.


Here are a few examples:


ME: Cate, please don't stick your finger up your nose/show your food to other people while you're eating/play the piano with your feet.


CATE: Why?


ME: It's not good manners.


Cate occasionally does something that she knows is naughty, smirks at me, and then asks, "Was that good manners, Mom?"


Then, of course, there are briefs moments when she really seems to have absorbed my pleas to just say "please," "thank you," and "excuse me."


I would like to think that such displays mean that I'm actually doing something right, that she's actually listening to me. (You can see where this is going, right?)


Last night Cate was coloring at the table with her Aunt Amy and they had the following conversation:


AMY: Wow, Cate. That's a really nice picture.


CATE: Thank you.


AMY: And you have really nice manners too.


CATE: I'm just makin' it up.

I think Oprah just might be a genius.

Feb. 08
Dec. 07


Although I greatly admire Oprah for a number of reasons, I rarely watch her show. Other than Sesame Street, I just don't have the tv on during the day.


My sister-in-law mentioned that Oprah is doing a series on how to "Clean Up Your Messy Home" and de-clutter your life.


One would think that I would have no reason to de-clutter my life since I just moved and thoroughly organized all of my belongings while neatly packing them into organized, labeled boxes.


(In reality, the first six boxes we packed were, in fact, organized and labeled. Then we ran out of time and started throwing things in boxes and hastily scribbling their contents on the outside. But I digress...)


Apparently one thing that Oprah's experts discussed was how to organize your child's artwork. The expert suggested that instead of hanging onto every piece of artwork that your child has ever produced and storing them in a pile in your closet (like I do!) one could take digital photos of your favorites and compile a photobook, allowing you to keep the images forever but discard the unruly stack of fingerpaints, watercolors, etc.


Brilliant.


AND my sister-in-law was gracious (kind, generous, thoughtul) enough to pick up Cate's masterpieces this evening and, as I write this post, is likely photographing them for a photobook.


Now that is really brilliant.

Good Question

The scene: One of the first cold days of the year. We're backing out of the driveway and talking about the cold weather.

Cate: Mommy, how does the warm get into our house?

Ben's Party!

Ben had an excellent birthday! Our families came to Iowa City on Sunday to celebrate with us.

I considered having a pirate-themed party but Cate was set on puppies. In retrospect, this was a good choice. Ben loves dogs (so much that he refers to any four-legged animal as a "dog") and dog was one of his first words.

We made "pupcakes" for the party:

Cate also decorated party bags for herself, Ben and her cousin, Ava:

Ben had lots of fun playing with (and climbing on) his new toys.

And the cake was good too!

Happy Birthday Dear Ben, Happy Birthday to YOU!

Today is Ben's 1st birthday! Happy birthday Ben!

The Best (Free!) Show in Town

Anyone with small children knows that the hour between 4:00 and 5:00pm is, without a doubt, the longest hour of the day.

I'm constantly trying to think of activities to distract us from the hunger pains, tiredness and general irritability (mine and theirs) that sets in around this time of day.

Today we went to watch the Iowa Hawkeye marching band practice off of Park Road (where they practice Tuesday through Friday from 3:30-5:15 during football season).

To say that Cate and Ben enjoyed watching the band would be an understatement.

They were statues. Rooted to the spot. Eyes wide. Mouths open.

They DID NOT MOVE for 30 minutes. Seriously.

They DID NOT MOVE for 30 minutes. I cannot EVER remember a time when BOTH of my children were completely still for 30 minutes.

They were simply mesmerized. The drums. The clarinets. The music. The marching. The golden girl. The conductor.

Cate wants to go back tomorrow.

(Big, big thanks to my friend, Sarah Tierney, for suggesting it!)

I love Mommy.

Many of you will remember a few months ago when Cate informed me that she loved Daddy more than Mommy (see "Have I Mentioned that Having Children is a Humbling Experience?")

Things have changed. Cate loves me so much that the mere thought of being away from me--whether for 5 minutes or 5 hours--launches her into dramatic crying jags. She clings to me, begging to be held, and repeats, "No Mommy! I don't want you to go! Stay here with me and Ben."

This, my friends, is a double-edged sword. It's nice to be loved but it would also be nice to get my hair cut without major drama.

Everyone assures me that this is a phase and that by the time she's 12 (or even 10) she won't want anything to do with me.

Cate is so attached to me that one might say she's become a bit possessive. A few weeks ago my mom was giving the kids a bath in the sink and she and Cate had the following conversation:




Grandma: I love you Cate.

Cate: I love Mommy.

Grandma: I love your Mommy too.

Cate: NO. ONLY I CAN LOVE MOMMY.

Nilla Wafers and Dog Biscuits

Cate: What are you eating?

Me: Nilla wafers. Want to try one?

Cate: What are they?

Me: They're like cookies. They're really good.

Cate: No. I don't want to try 'em.

Me: Why not?

Cate: They might be like dog biscuits.

The Princess and the Cowboy

A Comment on Pictures

As soon as I find all of the camera equipment...I promise to upload some pictures. :-)

Happy Halloween!

First Two Weeks in the New House: By the Numbers

Trips to the Emergency Room: 1

We moved in on Sunday. Chris left for LA Monday morning. By 5pm Monday night we were on our way to the ER.

Ben, our little explorer, ingested a rock from our fireplace, proceeded to choke, cry hysterically and then bleed from his mouth. I called the Peds Clinic, who suggested I call poison control. Poison Control suggested that I take Ben to the ER immediately. I did.

Two hours and several chest x-rays later, the doctor shrugged and said that if is stomach became distended (it didn’t) or he stopped going to the bathroom (he didn’t) that we should bring him back. Immediately.

Baby Gates: 3

One at the bottom of the stairs, one at the top of the stairs and one blocking the opening to the !@*#& fireplace. (See Trips to the Emergency Room).

Cate and I are trying to teach Ben to sit down when he goes down the stairs. Cate demonstrates and says things like, “Buddy, sit down on your bum. Like this.” Ben just smiles and then walks right off the edge---yes, just like the Road Runner in the Looney Tunes cartoon.

Empty Rooms: 0

It’s amazing how an assortment of Fisher Price Little People and Little Tykes play equipment can really warm up your home, making even a completely empty room seem filled.

Number of Times We Have Raked Our Leaves: 2

Note that our neighbors (many of whom are retired) have raked their leaves twice as many times in this two week period. I also noticed that there are still many, many trees in our yard with plenty of leaves left to fall.

I actually enjoyed raking this morning (although I will admit that I didn’t do the whole yard because the kids needed to eat) but I suspect that the novelty will wear off soon.

Remember this post when you say to your spouse, “Honey, I would just love to have wooded lot with lots of mature trees.”

Months We Had to Make a Double Mortgage Payment: 0

Miraculously, we closed on our old house October 31 at 11am, which meant that we completely avoided two mortgage payments. Thank you St. Joseph.

Chaos.

We moved to our new house over the weekend and the one word that best describes our life at this point is chaos. Total chaos.

We don't have the internet connected at the new place so I am taking a brief blogging vacation.

See you all next week. I'm sure I'll have some interesting moving/unpacking stories and photos to share.

Our Trip to the Mall

Today Cate, Ben and I went to the mall.

Yes, that is my Cate in the striped sweater hoodie, pajama top, rain boots and one of Ben's diapers. (In my defense, she was fully clothed before we left the house and when we arrived at the mall, for that matter).

Let us just say that the absence of her pants was the result of an unfortunate incident that took place involving copious amounts of baby wipes, an ill-stocked diaper bag, and the fact that I no longer travel with an extra set of clothes for my kids (a policy which may need to be revisited).

My "Real Age" Revisited...

July 2008


Leave it to little brothers to put things in perspective for you....

If you read my previous post you know that I was feeling a little bit smug about my "real age" being less than my biologial age. Pretty good for a 31-year-old mom who only manages to get on the treadmill 3 times a week (if the planets align, no one is sick, the kids nap at the same time and Chris isn't out of town).

Apparently I inspired my little brother, Devin (age 28), to take the RealAge test.

He described the results to me, via e-mail, as follows:

"I also took that real age test. For better for worse my real age came in at 18.7. (-9.7). I am not really sure if that is good or bad. Later. Devin"

Show-off.

Although, in all honesty, what did I expect from a guy whose idea of fun is biking 83-miles on a Sunday afternoon?

What's your "real age"?

The RealAge website and test are probably old news to those of you who regularly watch Oprah. I honestly can't remember the last time I saw Oprah so I average about 6-8 months behind the rest of the planet on finding out about new diets, lifestyle trends and books.

At book club a few months ago a friend mentioned that she had taken the RealAge test (tagline: Live Life to the Youngest!) and was fascinated by the results.

The test essentially compares your "calendar age" to your "biological age," based on your health, habits, relationships, diet and fitness level.

When I finally took the time to take the test I was surprised at how comprehensive it was--not only does it ask standard health questions (e.g., height, weight, blood pressure, medical conditions) but poses questions about education level, stress and social relationships, all of which must somehow be correlated with better health outcomes. Some sample questions I found interesting included: pet ownership, eating breakfast, group affiliations, and regularly attending a religious service.

I'm pleased to report that although my actual age is 31.1 the RealAge test suggests that I'm really 28.8 (a difference of 2.3 years).

According to the site I could lower my "real age" even further by engaging in the following activities:

1. Stop talking on the phone while driving
This, I feel, is quite unrealistic as driving in the car is the only time I can talk on the phone uninterrupted since my kids are securely buckled into their carseats and, therefore, unable to crawl up my leg and ask, "Who on the phone? What color her shoes? Can I talk to her?"

2. Get more sleep.
Oh if only Ben would agree to this...I've tried all of the sleep-through-the-night techniques recommended by every expert from Brazelton to Weissbluth with no luck. Maybe I simply need to discuss the results of this survey with Ben and try to impress upon him the importance of sleep for mommies and daddies.

3. Cut back on red meat.
In true Iowa fashion we actually purchased a quarter-side of beef from Chris' uncle this year and now our deep freeze is filled with roast, beef for stew, minute steak, hamburger patties and rump roast. Needless to say we are now eating red meat at almost every meal.

4. Floss daily.
Okay, this one is doable.

5. Reduce stress.
Given that I own two homes while the US economy teeters on the brink of disaster, I think that it might take some time before I'm able to constructively address this one. (Where is St. Joe when I need him?????)

Happy Friday!

YUM! Sand is GOOD!

(Notice a theme here?)

YUM! Pumpkins are GOOD!

Ben inspects the merchandise at his first trip to a pumpkin patch.

When I Grow Up...

Cate: Mommy, when I a grown-up I gonna' drink soda pop.

Me: OK. You can do that when you're a grown-up.

Cate: And beer.

Believe me, she did not learn this from us...

A few days ago I walked into the living room and found Cate lying on her back, knees bent, hands clasped behind her back.

Me: Cate, what are you doing?

Cate: Sit-ups.

Me: What? Who taught you how to do sit-ups.

Cate: I taught myself.

Clothes for Little Boys

I have to admit that it's hard to get excited about clothes for little boys.

Seriously, how many striped polo shirts and pairs of cargo pants can a 10-month old own? I'm definitely a sucker for littler girls' clothes (ruffles, ribbons, seersucker, polka dots) but until recently I could walk by shelves and shelves of boy's clothes (stripes, plaid, denim, khaki)without once feeling the urge to buy something.

That being said, I adore--really, I mean this--I adore Halloween-themed clothing for boys. I spent 30-minutes at Wal-Mart lingering over displays of t-shirts with the words "I Love My Mummy" and "Daddy's Little Monster" emblazoned across the front. I'm entranced by the ghosts, Frankensteins and pirates darting across little footie pajamas.

I've managed a little restraint, only purchasing two articles of clothing for Ben: ghost pj's and a skeleton t-shirt ($4.88 from Wal-Mart AND it glows in the dark).

An Empty Fridge

Even though we haven't officially moved, we've been spending a lot of time at our new house.

We painted Cate's room on Saturday and my parents brought her over on Saturday night to see the transformation.

Later that night as I was putting her to bed I asked, "So Cate, do you like our new house?"

"Yeah," she said. "But there not any food in the 'fridgerator. And there not any popsicles either."

Hmmm, I guess we have a few more items to add to the to-do list...

City High Homecoming Parade-2008

Me: Cate, what was your favorite part of the parade?

Cate: The part where they gave me candy.

Yum! Sidewalk chalk is GOOD!

Well, at least SOMEONE is enjoying the moving process...

Why Do Giraffes Have Purple Tongues?

We go to the Niabi Zoo pretty regularly. It's just outside the Quad Cities, about 50 minutes from Iowa City. If you haven't been there, you should really, really go! It's a small zoo but perfect for toddlers and preschoolers--they can easily walk the entire zoo and are able to get very close to the animals.

Cate and Ben love the zoo and we spend a lot of time looking at pictures taken during our visits.

Today I was reading something to her about giraffes--they are the tallest mammals, they have purple tongues, etc.

Cate: Why giraffes got purple tongues?

Me: I'm not really sure.

Cate: Maybe they eat grapes.

Me (cracking up on the inside while maintaining a very serious expression): Good point. Maybe they do eat a lot of grapes.

Change of Pace

I'm tired of the dots so I'm experimenting with other templates...

The New Man in our Lives

Well, it's official.

Chris and I are now the proud owners of TWO lovely Eastside Iowa City homes. Although I knew the day was coming, now that we've actually signed the papers the prospect of paying for these TWO homes has ratcheted my anxiety to levels reminiscent of my days in graduate school.

We've done everything we can think of to make our house attractive to prospective buyers. As I told our realtor yesterday, we are definitely Motivated Sellers. Among other things we have moved a small couch, four boxes of toys, all of Chris' winter clothes, one oak table, 6 assorted throw pillows, and bunch of junk into storage.

We have mowed our lawn with feverish regularity. We have rearranged furniture.

We have turned all of the food in our pantry so that the labels face forward. (Picture the scene from "Sleeping with the Enemy" where Julia Roberts opens her cupboard and finds all of her Campbell's soup and green beans neatly arranged and realizes her crazy husband has found her).

We have even sorted our washcloths by color in case a prospective buyer views a disorganized linen closet as a potential deal-breaker. Hell, we even planted mums by our front door.

So, we are now turning things over to a higher power: St. Joseph.

I purchased him for the bargain price of $7.50 at the Mercy Hospital gift shop last week. (I'm not sure why a hospital gift shop even stocks statues of St. Joseph but the volunteer manning the cash register told me they've been "flying off the shelves").

On Saturday, hoping to capitalize on some positive karma after the Iowa/Iowa State game, we buried him upside down in our backyard.

I admit that I'm a bit skeptical of St. Joe's powers. I find it a little convenient that you can only use him once--if you move again in the future you need to buy a new statue.

Oh yes, and there is a disclaimer on the package insert that indicates for St. Joseph to be "fully effective, however...sellers must, of course, first do such practical, yet all important chores, as completing all necessary fix-up, properly staging the home and finally, adjusting the price to as to reflect true market value."

Apparently St. Joe doesn't make any promises when it comes to a dirty, disorganized, overpriced home.

I'll keep you posted...

Here we go...

Today Cate asked me, "Mommy, do horses poop?"


(This picture of Ben was taken a few weeks ago. Our friend Char invited us to visit her horse, Advocate. Although Cate loves horses, she was too overwhelmed to sit on him, preferring to admire him from afar).

Word of the Day: Maker

maker

\mak-er\noun. 1. a person or thing that makes something. 2. chef or cook.

Example:

There was no food in the house and dinnertime was rapidly approaching. In a rare fit of culinary inspiration, Erin whipped up a batch of French toast for dinner.

Cate took one bite and declared, "MMMM! Mom you are a good maker."

Labor Day Weekend in San Francisco

Over Labor Day weekend my brothers, Chris and I went to San Francisco. We stayed with my uncle, Steve, who was a wonderful host--so good, in fact, that we'd like to plan a return trip. :-)

Some highlights:

- Wine tasting in Napa

- Riding in Devin's Ford Ranger XLT (NOTE: This is a very small truck. If you don't believe me, see the picture. The entire time we were in this truck I was wishing that Chris and I had actually executed our wills before leaving Iowa City as I could not stop picturing the tragic accident that would crush us, making our children orphans).

- Exploring Chinatown

- Alcatraz

- Driving down Lombard Street in Devin's Ford Ranger XLT

- Watching the sun set over the Pacific Ocean from an amazing restaurant called the Beach Chalet